Responding is very different than reacting. If you don’t know the difference, you won’t make much progress to become resilified. A person who can respond rather than just react, will be able to thoughtfully move forward to a happier life. Here are a few differences between reacting and responding:
- Reacting is thoughtless. Responding is thoughtful.
- Reacting is careless. Responding is careful.
- Reacting is mindless of our body signals. Responding is mindful of our bodily sensations.
- Reacting is behavior based on past patterns. Responding is behavior based on new possibilities in the moment.
- Reacting is virtually instantaneous. Responding allows time for consideration.
- Reacting is constricted to a narrow range of choices (based in the past). Responding is a creative act that is not restricted by the past.
- Reacting is generally self-centered. Responding considers the needs of all involved.
- Reacting is often overly emotional. Responding is more measured and logical but creates more joy in the future.
- Reacting is often programmed from childhood. Responding is developed as a more mature strategy to problem-solve.
- Reacting often conceals the real problem. Responding often gets to the crux of the real problem.
- Reacting often creates distress in ourselves and others. Responding often creates safety, security and happiness in ourselves and others.
Obviously, learning to be responsive rather than blindly reactive is a goal that resilient people strive for. Because of these distinctions described above, here are some benefits of becoming a responsive rather than reactive person:
- Responsive people are great to live around. Nobody likes dealing with someone who has “hair-trigger” reactions. It’s too stressful.
- Responsive people are excellent problem solvers. Because they don’t engage in “knee-jerk” reactions, they can consider many options.
- Responsive people can meet the needs of themselves and others. Because they are thoughtful and considerate, they are more aware of other’s needs and can devise ways to meet these needs.
- Responsive people create more choices. Because they don’t get their ego invested in defensive actions, they are free to be creative and innovative.
- Responsive people are more confident. They know that they can usually cope with most challenges because they have a wide repertoire of responses. And if they don’t have the answer immediately, they can come up with a solution in time. They don’t get stuck in old frustrating patterns.
The things that are offered on Resilified can contribute to becoming a responsive rather than a reactive person. And that will make life better all the way around.